Who Gives a Crap

入得谷来,祸福自求。
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Knowing
Posts: 32346
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:37

Who Gives a Crap

Post by Knowing » 2020-03-19 5:28

前两周,ocado 还在正常运转,有天我们订的grocery 到了。我在楼上工作,素食男开门,ocado 的送货员照例帮忙把东西拿进来,听见素食男马上说:对不起,你是不是弄错了单?送货员看了单,忙道歉。我在楼上挺好奇,我下的单,素食男怎么会马上知道是送错了货?后来问,他表情有些暧昧的说:我想,你不会订那么多卫生纸。
的确,缺啥都不缺卫生纸,过去一年没买过, 家里还满坑满谷。看到大家抢囤卫生纸,我很不解,不是说肺炎么?难道他们错听成了腹泻?有人就要反问:那么你们家早早囤那么多卫生纸是为什么?这话说起来,Who Gives a Crap。
无图无真相,炫富实拍, 注意这不是我家全部收藏,其他在床底下柜子里的都懒得去拍了。
Image

素食男,是一个善良的人,是一个关心环境的人,是一个数学不太好的人,所以他非常主张按月订购,细水长流的支持小企业,尤其是以环保为号召的小企业。所以有天他跟我说,有个叫Who Gives a Crap的100%再生卫生纸公司来勾搭生意,(公司名字双关语起的太逗了!这也投他所好)我们应该订一些,我没多想就同意了。送货又经常是我不在家的时候,过了几个月,等我发现客房里堆着好几箱卫生纸(每箱48卷),大惊失色,他承认订了每月一箱。我很郁闷的质问:你有没有想过,我们三个人,每月用多少卫生纸?买一箱就够用一年的了!他想了想,承认估计不准确。同意停止订购。

下个月,我们收到一箱卫生纸,一箱厨房纸抹布。原因是他打电话去取消订单时,客服强烈推荐新产品厨房纸抹布,为了减少对方的失望,他买了一箱。不知道为什么,无能的客服没有取消卫生纸,只加上了纸抹布。我愤怒的要求退货,素食男觉得一箱纸运来运去未免碳脚印太大,留着慢慢用好了。又打电话去取消订单。纸抹布我们是要用的,所以我咆哮了一下就同意了。

再下一个月,我们收到一箱卫生纸,一箱厨房纸抹布, 一箱盒装面巾纸。有小绿这个鼻涕虫,面巾纸我们也是要用的,消耗还很大,素食男说。我已经没力气跟他生气....总之三个月之后卫生纸终于不再出现了。

当然他现在很洋洋得意,觉得自己太有先见之明。而who gives a crap 这个无能善良的小公司,也迎来了春天,现在网站上宣布卖断货。

Holy Crap. We've sold out of TP.

Well. That. Was. Crazy. With all the panic buying madness, we’ve sold out and are working as hard as possible to restock. While we do, we want to acknowledge that these are crazy times. We feel it too. So while we work to restock, please think about how we can all do our bit to encourage kindness, empathy and calm. If you have spare rolls, see if your neighbours need some. Dance around your living room. Watch some puppy videos.

Hugs,
Who Gives A Crap
Last edited by Knowing on 2020-03-19 6:42, edited 1 time in total.
Nevertheless, she persisted.

CAVA
Posts: 7937
Joined: 2003-12-06 16:55

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by CAVA » 2020-03-19 6:15

哈哈,真是可爱的故事。

包装也很可爱啊。

Knowing
Posts: 32346
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:37

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by Knowing » 2020-03-19 6:44

的确是个善良可爱的小公司,就是客服太无能。等一等,客服非常能干,能卖给我们这么多卫生纸....
Nevertheless, she persisted.

CAVA
Posts: 7937
Joined: 2003-12-06 16:55

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by CAVA » 2020-03-19 7:27

就是,看准环保人士不太抹得下面子跟他们真生气。

tiffany
Posts: 23730
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:59

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by tiffany » 2020-03-19 9:56

这客服,哪儿是客服啊, 金牌销售啊!能不给你退东西还卖给你那么多东西!

你看,谁老说数学没用来着,买个手纸都用的上啊 :mrgreen:
有酒有酒 闲饮东窗

笑嘻嘻
Posts: 21282
Joined: 2003-11-22 18:00

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by 笑嘻嘻 » 2020-03-19 11:33

我很想回贴说:Who gives a crap! :mrgreen:

但是!大户啊!说不定手纸就要变成硬通货了呢……
云浆未饮结成冰

豪情
Posts: 19709
Joined: 2003-11-22 18:47

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by 豪情 » 2020-03-19 12:03

buttcoin
却将万字平戎策 换得东家种树书

Jun
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Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by Jun » 2020-03-19 12:26

豪情 wrote:
2020-03-19 12:03
buttcoin
:worthy: 太有才了。 :admir001:
There was nothing to warn anyone about. The world went on, even as it fell apart, changed irrevocably, became something strange and different. --- "Acceptance" in The Southern Reach Trilogy by Jeff VanderMeer

笑嘻嘻
Posts: 21282
Joined: 2003-11-22 18:00

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by 笑嘻嘻 » 2020-03-19 12:36

:applaudit01:
云浆未饮结成冰

Knowing
Posts: 32346
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:37

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by Knowing » 2020-03-19 13:16

小豪有才!
最近网上的卫生纸段子特多,笑死人
Nevertheless, she persisted.

putaopi
Posts: 3721
Joined: 2006-01-18 23:35

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by putaopi » 2020-03-19 13:22

感慨一下,卫生卷纸的包装真好看啊!素食男不是因为看上了包装设计才订了货吧?

CAVA
Posts: 7937
Joined: 2003-12-06 16:55

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by CAVA » 2020-03-19 13:24

Twin同学与我的关注点果然一致 :hutch:

dropby
Posts: 10118
Joined: 2003-11-24 12:23

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by dropby » 2020-03-19 13:25

点赞素食男。

我觉得我家厕纸够用到大家不再抢的,所以居然曾经已经到了costco还有货然后大家都已经在一车车地买的时候没有囤。那天家里没牛奶了我去沃尔玛买牛奶,牛奶都卖光了,手纸限购一包。我不理智地高价买了一包回来。 :mrgreen:

putaopi
Posts: 3721
Joined: 2006-01-18 23:35

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by putaopi » 2020-03-19 13:51

CAVA wrote:
2020-03-19 13:24
Twin同学与我的关注点果然一致 :hutch:
握手!

我家里的卫生纸够用,但是看到小K的照片还是想买。另一个感受就是说我家的卫生纸只配被堆在车库角落,而小K的才值得占据壁橱的空间。

豪情
Posts: 19709
Joined: 2003-11-22 18:47

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by 豪情 » 2020-03-19 13:55

Knowing wrote:
2020-03-19 13:16
小豪有才!
最近网上的卫生纸段子特多,笑死人
不是我发明的。只是偶尔看到。苦中作乐时候段子特别多。现在我理解为啥国内这么多段子手了。

昨天看到CNN一个标题是魔幻现实主义。从武汉开始我已经有此感慨了。
却将万字平戎策 换得东家种树书

Knowing
Posts: 32346
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:37

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by Knowing » 2020-03-19 14:31

哎,我有段时间看段子笑不出来了,最近好一点。

cava 葡萄皮你们买卫生纸是看包装的吗?一包纸里就这一张是没有用的呀!我表示不解。这么喜欢要不要我攒起来给你们寄去。。。

小美果然感性!
Nevertheless, she persisted.

sunset
Posts: 38
Joined: 2009-12-28 4:22

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by sunset » 2020-03-19 14:49

Jun wrote:
2020-03-19 12:26
豪情 wrote:
2020-03-19 12:03
buttcoin
:worthy: 太有才了。 :admir001:
真的,这方面语感属豪情敏锐。还记得以前说惠英红、郑佩佩能打又美艳,也是豪情注解说 “睇得打得”,就是俏皮又准确。

Knowing
Posts: 32346
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:37

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by Knowing » 2020-03-19 15:26

你们一说,我留神看了眼包装纸,每张上都不忘贫嘴,切切叮嘱不要忘了补货,世界上没有比卫生纸用完更糟糕的事儿了,没有!
Image

设计者先见之明预料有一天卫生纸会成为硬通货,用来送礼很体面的,所以包装纸兼任礼品卡问候。

Image
Nevertheless, she persisted.

tiffany
Posts: 23730
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:59

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by tiffany » 2020-03-19 15:33

哇,真是第一世界的手纸!
有酒有酒 闲饮东窗

笑嘻嘻
Posts: 21282
Joined: 2003-11-22 18:00

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by 笑嘻嘻 » 2020-03-19 17:09

包装纸和礼品卡是回收造纸吗?我很加州人地问。
云浆未饮结成冰

helenClaire
Posts: 3137
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:12

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by helenClaire » 2020-03-19 18:58

土豪啊!网上有照片,一卷卫生纸卖$3999,并附送一克拉钻戒。小K家光钻石就得几百克拉。 :worthy:

Knowing
Posts: 32346
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:37

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by Knowing » 2020-03-20 1:52

低调的奢华 :f21:

对于笑嘻嘻,我只能说:there is first world, and then there is california
Nevertheless, she persisted.

putaopi
Posts: 3721
Joined: 2006-01-18 23:35

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by putaopi » 2020-03-20 16:28

诚实地回答小K, 我买什么都看包装, always judge a book by its cover......对买椟还珠的人我是很同情的。

qinger
Posts: 5647
Joined: 2003-12-24 15:09

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by qinger » 2020-03-20 17:41

这些厕所纸现在多珍贵啊。
所以,you never know...
我家以前买来防花粉过敏的N95口罩我以为永远用不掉,这次成了稀奇资源,N95哎。
现在偶是胡军的扇子。

putaopi
Posts: 3721
Joined: 2006-01-18 23:35

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by putaopi » 2020-03-20 21:33

刚才我把素食男的故事读给某人听,他评论说 “这说明善良的人总是有好报的”。请小K 转达 :mrgreen:

Knowing
Posts: 32346
Joined: 2003-11-22 20:37

Re: Who Gives a Crap

Post by Knowing » 2020-03-21 12:53

转达了,他很有知己之感,跟葡萄皮家先生virtual elbow bump!
Nevertheless, she persisted.

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